One of our occasional contributors, hapless office-boy John Bascom, has provided his list of 2019 New Year’s Resolutions. In view of our political climate and how they influenced his resolutions, we thought we’d share them with you here:
We admit it: we’re fascinated by the hypocrisy of the left. It’s at the same time stomach-turning and riveting, like not being able to avert one’s eyes from a deadly automobile accident that is unfolding.
Enter Cory Booker, the uber-liberal Democrat who led the charge against poor, defenseless Bret Kavanaugh. You remember, Kavanaugh was the Supreme Court nominee (now an Associate Justice, thank the Lord) who was accused of sexual assault over thirty years ago when he was still a high school teen. The charges were leveled without corroboration, even by the accuser’s best friend who was supposedly a witness but who then denied it (actually, nobody remembered it). Kavanaugh was confirmed, but not until the left went ballistic, screaming and protesting (still) that an accuser must be believed without evidence of any kind. Cory “I’m Spartacus” Booker led the merciless onslaught.
He then put his left hand on my groin, over my jeans, and began to rub…He then used his other hand to grab my left hand with his right and pulled it over to touch him. At the same time, he disengaged from rubbing me and used his left hand to push me to my knees from my shoulder for what was clearly a move to have me perform oral sex on him. At that point, I pulled away quite violently…
…anonymous Booker accuser
But the reaction from the left is a little—shall we say—different this time. The national broadcast media—we all know how they roll—are not pushing the story like they immediately did with Kavanaugh. Nor are the Dems angrily and self righteously demanding Booker’s removal from office. No, now that it’s one of them, they are painting it as a smear without merit of any sort. And if this isn’t paradox enough for you, CNN actually defended him regarding a separate incident of sexual assault perpetrated by Booker when he was fifteen. Of course, when those excuses were (rightly, in our view) made by Kavanaugh supporters they were vilified. Now they are righteous when used to defend crazy Cory Booker.
For our part, we give no greater credence at this point to Booker’s uncorroborated bathroom accuser as we did to Kavanaugh’s. The irony is in the left’s hypocrisy in outrage over the accusations against Kavanaugh, and then defending their own when basically the same type of accusations are leveled.
The most amazing thing is, in the face of this continuing hypocrisy and dishonesty on the left, everyone is expecting a blue wave on election day in two weeks. Go figure!
Guest contributor Pat McQueen has some thoughts to share with us regarding the recent Kavanaugh confirmation process and the role of some of the protesters. Pat is a financial consultant, retired banker and former State of Michigan Banking Commissioner, although he still has lucid moments. While his thoughts don’t conform to the usual satire we deal in, they still shed light on some of the shenanigans going on in political Washington. Enjoy.
All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts…
As You Like It…William Shakespeare
We were entertained by several “players” during the confirmation hearings. Nominee Brett Kavanaugh and his sexual assault accuser Dr. Ford both gave impressive performances. One may find this hard to believe, but my favorite performance was that of Ana Marie Archila, the “entertainer” performing in and around the elevator occupied by Senator Jeff Flake on or about September 28. Ms. Archila’s best line was screaming, “Look at me!”
Listening to CNN and Fox News during the Kavanaugh and Ford performances alternately, both networks provided what I would consider fair reviews for the most part.
When Ana Maria Archila gave her performance, however, I was listening to CNN. Archila’s passionate, and sometimes obnoxious, performance was reviewed in detail by CNN. The Archila reviews took a vastly different tone. CNN knew who Kavanaugh and Ford were. They had studied Ford for days and Kavanaugh for months. CNN had no idea who Archila was, yet they gave her an amazing amount of time, great deference and sympathy. My recollection is that CNN characterized Archila’s performance as powerful.
CNN fell into a trap. The trap was set by MoveOn.org, the Center for Popular Democracy and Ms. Archila. As it turns out, Ms. Archila is very good at what she does, with an annual salary and bonus in excess of $175,000 per year as co-executive director of the latter organization. The Wall Street Journal, page A19, Monday, October 8 is my source.
Archila is a paid activist that put on the performance of her life.
It shook Senator Flake and delayed and altered the confirmation process. CNN bought it hook, line and sinker, giving her instant credibility by providing her the stage, lots of time and a glowing reviews. Archila was either “fake news” reported by CNN or CNN was simply hoodwinked; your call.
If CNN had reported that Archila was a lobbyist would it have made a difference? Did CNN have an obligation to conduct any due diligence on Archila? Was CNN’s handling of the confrontation influenced by any biases or predispositions?
If I ran the NRA I would hire Archila. Maybe not; it is highly unlikely that such a riveting performance would be given any credibility by CNN on a pro-Second Amendment topic.
That is the problem.
Finally, if I were in charge of the U.S. Senate, I would not allow paid (or even unpaid) political activists unfettered access to members of the United States Senate during working hours. Flake ended up looking like a fool.
Unfortunately, CNN and its followers will continue to believe “Look at me!”
Ms. Archila, great acting! You should get an Oscar! You are vastly underpaid.
The Devil is well documented in human history. He (some believe SHE) is mentioned numerous times in The Bible. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines him (or is it her?) as “the personal supreme spirit of evil”. And you remember the television icon of the 60s and 70s, Flip Wilson, who personally testified to The Devil’s interference in his life. He, of course, would never lie. There is other irrefutable evidence as well. Yes, the Devil is REAL and we know who he is.
HardWired News has now accessed amazing new technology that allows us to physically identify the actual Devil. Our scientists have recently perfected a Spiritually Induced Quantum Field Fluctuation Detector (SIQFFD or “sig-fuh-fid” for short). This innovation scans quantum field disturbances around a person caused by their spiritual self, otherwise invisible to the eye. Our researches have scanned millions of conventional images with the new technology, and have positively identified the individual who, despite all appearances to the contrary, is actually the Devil.
As any observer can see, the Devil is actually Judge Brett Kavanaugh! If the actual sig-fuh-fid scan is not enough, consider the following shocking facts about dirty-rotten Kavanaugh:
Drank beer in high school and college
Threw ice at a guy in a bar once
Took sides in a quarrel between roommates.
Can’t prove he didn’t assault someone at a teen beer party
Now, in the interest of full disclosure, the last one was denied by the Devil, can’t be corroborated by anyone including the people the complaining woman said were there; was flat-out denied under oath by a third party that the complaining woman said was a witness; was made by a democrat ideologue at the very end of a nomination process where Kavanaugh (did we mention he’s Republican?) was about to be recommended for the Supreme Court; wasn’t discovered in seven FBI background checks; and wasn’t brought up years before when he was overwhelmingly confirmed to the most important Federal appellate court in the country. But, hey, if any one of those charges is true (especially drinking beer – who does that?!), it should be enough to disqualify him from public office and prove he is the Devil. And we have plenty of other evidence of his evil: we just don’t want to talk about it right now.
Yes, the evidence is clear; Brett Kavanaugh is the Devil. Now go out and protest or something.
Are you like me, confused when national news events become convoluted headlines in the liberal press that bear little relationship to what actually happened? Well, help is on the way. HardWired News has performed an exhaustive scientific study of normal and liberal headlines, especially when they involve President Trump. We’ve constructed this handy translator to help ordinary people navigate from one to the other (thanks to confidant CW for the idea):
Well, we think you get the picture. Hopefully liberal headlines will now be more understandable to normal people with this handy translator. In the meantime, poo on fake news and Keep America Great
You remember we took a hiatus last October to come up for air. The lunacy of the liberal left made us more than a little apoplectic, so like a whipped puppy we retreated under the bed for a while. And while we won’t resume regular weekly articles, look for the occasional piece that strikes our fancy now and again.
The reason for our return now was an amazing advance in technology that could not be ignored. Through the efforts of renowned scientists laboring as an interactive team around the globe and using the latest advances in quantum computing, artificial intelligence, and nano-engineering, it is now possible to divine how things will be in the future. Fortunately, HardWired News has gained exclusive rights to the technology and has been able to access the front page of The New York Times, the September 17, 2518 edition. Here are a few headlines 500 years from now:
September 17, 2518
HISTORIC POLITICAL ACCORD REACHED
Republican Party Officially Banned
Imprisoned Repubs to be Paroled – Agreement to Cease Further Executions
LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCIES CONSOLIDATE UNDER ANTIFA
Peace, Love, Kindness & Harmony to Prevail Under Penalty of Death
NEW LEVELS OF NATIONAL PROSPERITY REACHED
Food Stamps, Welfare, Unemployment, Disability Payments Extend to 97% of Population
NATIONAL DEBT TO BE ERASED IN 27th U.S. BANKRUPTCY
“I can’t believe these suckers keep buying our bonds” – President
WEALTHY COUNTRIES PROMISE AID TO U.S.
Puerto Rico, Mexico, Bangladesh Pledge Food, Medicine
COURT RULES COLLEGES DISCRIMINATE AGAINST THE STUPID
Universities Required to Remove Confusing Calculations from Science Courses
Dems Pledge Fair Education for All
NEW BRIDGES, DAMS COLLAPSING AT RECORD RATE
Designed by Latest Crop of Engineers – Reason a Mystery
CONVICTIONS FOR STEALING WIND SOAR
Worse Since All Fossil Fuels Were Banned
Bootleg Windmill Surge Stumps Officials at Department of Wishful Thinking & Energy Rationing
BUREAU OF SCARY PREDICTIONS SAYS WARMING TO WIPE OUT CIVILIZATION IN 10 YEARS
Fiftieth Consecutive Prediction
Officials Unable to Explain Deniers
SUPREME COURT SAYS ALL LOTTERY TICKET BUYERS TO RECEIVE SAME PAYOUT
Unfair Enrichment of Privileged Few Deemed Unconstitutional
“Drop in Lottery Ticket Sales a Mystery”: Secretary of Fair Economics
NATIONAL NETWORK OF MILLION COMFORT SHELTERS TO BE EXPANDED
Safe Havens for Liberals Traumatized by Opinions Different from Mainstream
School Comfort Counselor Per Student Ratio Reaches 1 for 1
Have you enjoyed HardWired News? Hundreds of others have with many thousands of visits to our website to read our quirky articles during the three months since we started it.
We admit we’re right-leaning. And we’re unconventional. Our style is not to rant or rave about political issues, but to inform through humor, satire, or parody. We’ve presented our beloved readers with faux New York Times articles lampooning the way they weave ideology into “news” reporting. Then there were the put-ons of the pomposity of figures like Hillary Clinton or the inescapable bigotry of the liberals. Remember the time we announced the spread of the deadly disease “Liberalitis,” or the fact that the ultimate victimizer and Austin Powers’ nemesis, Dr. Evil, had been identified and located on a mountaintop in Nevada? We had as good a laugh writing it as hopefully you did reading it.
It’s mostly done with tongue-in-cheek with the intent of creating a smile in our divided world, while still making valid points to help more people understand and reflect upon the nuisances of the issues of the day.
But, as the lead-in Bible quote to this article suggests, there is a time and place for everything and ours is drawing to an end, at least on a regular basis. We approached this project as a short-term beta test to judge its appeal and gauge reader reaction. Those goals have been accomplished. We’ve attracted many hundreds of fans on the main website and our Facebook page, and have garnered a robust and loyal readership. But it’s hard to overstate the time and effort involved in creating the regular stream of quality content many of you have come to enjoy, and so many of our points have now been made.
So, for now, we are taking a hiatus and moving on to other projects, at least for a time. You may still see the very occasional piece here when something really rings our bell, but the three-to-four articles weekly will sadly stop for the time being.
Thank you for reading, enjoying (some liberals gave us bloody hell), and commenting on HardWired News. The site will still be here, and you can always contact us through the About page. For now, know that we deeply value your loyal readership, and wish you a bittersweet Adieu until we meet again.
Arizona Sen. Jeff Flake issued a blistering critique of President Donald Trump in a speech on the Senate floor Tuesday, announcing that he will not seek re-election in 2018. That speech followed weeks of scathing public criticism from another outgoing Republican Senator, Tennessee’s Bob Corker. Arizona Sen. John McCain has also regularly spoken out against Trump.
Now, technically these things really happened. But it’s the context that’s misleading. Flake and Cork are both leaving the senate because they are too unpopular in their home states to get reelected, and the aging McCain, bitter over his failed presidential bids, is sick and also will not be reelected. The story, at least the lead-in, makes it seem as if Republican leaders have turned on Donald Trump, when in effect it’s a handful of bitter people on their way (unwillingly) out.
But even that is not the main point. Yesterday’s political news was an explosion, where it was revealed that the Clinton campaign actually paid for an operative to collude with Russia to falsely implicate then-candidate Trump in a series of preposterous allegations about sex and money in Russia. I’m talking about the Fusion GPS report that has been discredited as a scam by just about everyone. Then they gave it to the Obama-era FBI who actually began the now pervasive Trump-Russia probe based on a phony set-up by the Dems and Clinton.
My amazement at this turn of events is overwhelming. But my point here is that YahooNews (motto: Fake News On Demand) ignores that and runs with a “Trump Dissed by Fellow Republicans” story instead. It’s designed clearly as cover for the Dems.
Is it any wonder nearly two-thirds of all Americans believe the media news about Trump is either fake, or they aren’t quite sure yet? Thanks, Yahoo, for proving the point.