Did you notice that over this past holiday weekend, all our favorite news reporters were nowhere to be found? They were enjoying the long weekend, and putting in the third-string wannabees to take their places. And on these holiday forays where reporters are AWOL, no news seems to occur except the occasional thing that simply can’t be ignored, like North Korea’s nuclear blast. Then when the regulars have returned to their desks, the stories flood the airwaves and news pages. How do they get them ready so quickly?
HardWired News has learned how. The reporters write various stories for every contingency before they leave . Then when they return, they simply air the one that most fits the bill. Here is a sampling we have uncovered.
CNN: If we respond militarily to NOKO
TRUMP ATTACKS NORTH KOREA WITHOUT PROVOCATION
Unhinged President Plunges U.S. Needlessly Into War
If we don’t respond militarily
TRUMPS RUNS FROM NORTH KOREA
Cowardly President Emboldens Enemy, Puts America at Risk
VOGUE: If Melania Trump wears high heels again to visit flood victims
FIRST LADY INSENSITIVE TO SUFFERING FLOOD VICTIMS
High Fashion Visit Is All About HER
If she wears tennis shoes
MELANIA TRUMP INSULTS HURRICANE SUFFERERS
“Slumming” Attire a Slap in the Face to Victims
NY Times: If Trump halts DACA safe-haven program for juvenile illegal aliens
TRUMP SAVAGES LATINO CHILDREN FOR POLITICAL GAIN
Sacrifices Kids, Families to Appeal to His Racist Base
If he continues the DACA program
TRUMP RETREATS FROM KEY CAMPAIGN PLEDGE
Shows His Dishonesty – Will Say Anything to Get Elected
And on and on and on for every potential eventually. It’s good to see our hard working, dispassionate, fair, unbiased press (oh, hell…we all know they aren’t) are always ready to bring us the news. Unfair and unbalanced.